Report on the best excuses for late payment from businesses.Gordon Mowat from Aspire Management Services study into the best excuses businesses are giving for not paying invoices – and what to do about it. Competition winner, Anne Farr, Director of Rothera Group tells us the excuse she heard that won her the competition.

Seattle, WA (PRWEB) February 25, 2010 –-

Amazon Books announces a powerful new volume that provides an inside look at police discretion and their decision making process related to traffic tickets. This high-energy manual is the only factual and humorous Driver’s Survival Guide for those who push the limits of the law. No Quota! is the Speeder’s Bible, a thrifty operator’s manual that chronicles an inside look of the mental processes of traffic officers as they evaluate actual justifications, smoke screens and excuses made after neglectful driving and other traffic mistakes. This book is the only publication of its kind — written by cops who share from the gut without restraint.

Amazon just posted this 200 page handbook, which includes both the bizarre and best excuses from North America. The book offers a side by side comparison of what driver’s said to the police followed by the strong and stunning interpretation by the cops who processed the excuse. This exclusive instruction manual provides the reader with good advice, strong warnings, and some cost effective suggestions on negotiating when confronted with blue lights, lots of leather, and a dash of ego.

Written by Marcus Mann, a retired Police Operations Chief, The Speeder’s Bible starts by eliminating any questions regarding “police profiling” stating, the police do profile and will continue to do so. After describing details of exactly how the police profile driver and vehicle, Mann takes off the gloves to deliver puncture wounds to both arrogant drivers and aloof officers. He articulates clear guidance supported by hilarious illustrations – the dos and don’ts – for the speed demon, tipsy drivers, and those – young and old – who insist on pushing the limits of the law.

This riotous and sometimes cynical handbook includes spontaneous statements from the innocent, ignorant, the egocentric, and the horribly intoxicated – all rated for use and often avoidance. A helpful editorial comment eliminates any confusion by clearly stating what the officer heard as he processed seemingly innocent comments and assertions by the driver. Readers will be shocked and entertained by the candor in this book and in what truly tips the police officer toward an arrest over a verbal warning.

While The Speeder’s Bible shares surprising and entertaining secrets, it also delivers an unmistakable and serious message related to the dark results of an attitude and mouth out of control. The book also does a remarkable job of weaving in the distressing nature of untreated alcoholism, stress and addiction.

For additional information on the book and author, you may visit the listed website or make live contact via the information provided below.

Book Website: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1450500811/

Contact:

Marcus Mann

206.501.9170

upattitude (at) live (dot) com

www.SoundPredictions.com

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When you think of your dream girl, what comes to mind? Is it intelligence? Is it physical beauty? Is it a deep spiritual foundation?

What if you met a girl who met all of your standards, but had previously posed topless or nude? Would that change your impression of her or would you still see the same enduring qualities that initially caught your eye?

”No, I couldn’t do that,” said Donald Jarrell, 28, of Houston. “If you were just dealing with a girl and she’s new to your team, then it’s kind of alright. But if she’s your bottom or main girl, that can’t happen.”

However, R.S., 28, also of Houston, said it is OK if his girlfriend posed topless, “as long as it was done in good taste … and she had control of the photo shoot and control of what is shown.”

Although R.S. would support his girlfriend posing topless, he believes it is unacceptable for any woman he dates to pose nude.

Nevertheless, Jeremy Sadoff, 28, of Melbourne, Fla., said he would totally support his wife if she posed topless or nude.

Sadoff said he would not mind at all if his friends were able to see his wife nude stating, “If she wanted to I would let her.”

Eric Halvorsen, 29, of Houston said in order for him to feel comfortable with his wife posing topless or nude it would have to be for a substantial amount of money and for a respected publication like Playboy.

”The money would have to be so much that neither one of us would ever have to work again, because if not, your old lady just became a stripper and you are pimping,” Halvorsen explained.

Jarrell believes that women who use exotic dancing and posing as a means to fund their college education are just looking for an easy excuse.

”That’s something to think about, but there are so many ways someone can find finances for school. People just need to take time to research different scholarships and financial assistance, than to pose for money … That’s just the best excuse they can come up with,” he said.

Bruce Smith, 44, of San Antonio, said he would not have a problem with dating a woman who had posed as a means to fund her education or career. He also said he would not have a problem with dating a celebrity who had posed topless or nude in a mainstream movie.

”If she posed before our relationship, I would not have a problem with it. But I would see no reason for it during our relationship,” Smith said.

Jarrell said he has befriended girls who have posed nude or been involved with exotic dancing, but cannot see anything beyond a friendship with such women.

He said, “I could never value and treasure them … Even if they changed their life that sticks with you. The only thing they could be recognized as is some cool chicks that the fellas could kick it with and hang out.”

”But as far as being with me or you’re gonna love me or marry me, that ain’t happening.”

Let’s face it, for most of us, getting through our busy days can be a challenge.  Between work and family obligations, you find you have precious little time to do anything for yourself, which usually means putting important activities, such as training, on the back burner – again.

The irony, of course, is that the only way to survive such an active lifestyle is to make sure your body and mind are healthy and happy – which can only be accomplished if you “take” the time to train and workout properly, a minimum of 3 to 5 times a week.  This, in itself, can prove to be a major challenge, especially if you have to trek to your local gym each and every time.

Fortunately, if you live in the Vancouver, B.C. area, you can now enjoy a challenging and fun training session, right in the comfort of your own home, with a little help from a certified Vancouver personal trainer.   Contrary to popular belief, personal trainers are not only available at your gym, but rather, are happy to work, on a one to one basis with you, in your office or home, thereby easily accommodating any schedule you may have, all the while helping you “get in” as much training time as possible.  As an added bonus, you can also feel comfortable in knowing that you can “hire” a personal trainer without fear of having to commit to a long term contract.  A definite win-win situation!

Imagine being able to work from home, using your equipment, all the while benefitting from the professional (and safe!) instructions of your very own Vancouver based personal trainer, minus the hoopla, noise and distractions that are so often found at the gym.  It will be all about you and your body.

You can enjoy a training program, designed especially for you, that will be just as challenging as any program offered at the gym.  You can work out to the music you enjoy, using as much or as little equipment as you need, all the while knowing that your personal trainer is right next to you, offering advice, encouragement and, most importantly, the motivation that you will need to “get to that next level”.

Thanks to Vancouver certified fitness trainers, we now have more options than ever, when it comes to getting fit, losing weight and staying healthy.  They are the “go to” people who can make it happen, who can make it all come together for you, despite all of your “best” excuses.

If you can’t get to the gym, your personal trainer will bring the gym to you!  No more excuses.

CompBob! explains why he was late for work….
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You learn many things in a Yoga class, such as: Living in the present moment; but how can you put your Yoga into practice in today’s hectic world? We learn to meditate so the mind will stop multi-tasking, but once you leave the Yoga studio, or ashram, you have to face the world again.

So, how do you take the soothing effects of your Yoga practice and apply them to the rest of your day? Develop a system where you use your time wisely. This is the wisdom of time management, as applied to “real life.”

We’re not discussing a “catch phrase,” or short-term solution, where a manager goes to a one-day workshop on time management, and then comes back lecturing his, or her, staff, about their time management.

The irony is that, most of the time, this type of manager is aware of time management because he, or she, wastes plenty of time. This usually goes on until the next workshop, and then management will learn a new catch phrase to tell the staff what they are doing wrong.

What we are discussing is a lifestyle, and possibly a big change, just like the first time you visited a Yoga class. In a “nut shell,” we have limited time on this earth and we cannot afford to waste it thinking about future worries, past regrets, fighting with loved ones, or leaving goals on hold.

Most of us leave dreams, goals, relationships, and ambitions on the “back burner,” while the daily routine of life goes by. No wonder people complain about the monotony of daily tasks. Very often, we hear, “I don’t have time to learn new skills, go to night school, practice Yoga, or become a Yoga teacher.”

Remember when you were a child and life seemed to go by so slowly? You had time to play, watch television, listen to the radio, and lay around, without a care in the world. Now, welcome to adulthood, life is flying by at a rapid pace, and goals sometimes seem further away than ever before.

Your starting point is today. All you have to do is write your list of tasks for tomorrow. This is commonly called a “to do list.” You can post it on a piece of paper, on your desktop, in your PDA, or anywhere you will refer to it in a day.

To be honest, I put the piece of paper in my pocket and refer to it during the day. Sometimes, the lesson plan for my next Yoga class can be found in my pocket, too. This is a reflection of my time line, and my generation, but my son would put it on his PDA. Whatever you choose is fine, as long as you refer to it, and get something done.

Notice, I did not say get everything done. Somehow, life throws us curves and your “well laid” plans may not fit into the daily time frame. You learn this in your Yoga practice too. It is absolutely necessary that all of us accept change. These days, change occurs on a daily basis, so there is no need to become tense about it. This explains why so many corporate fitness centers have Yoga, or meditation programs, for their employees.

Be prepared to make modifications to your plans or “turn on a dime.” Deadlines should be taken seriously, but sometimes life gets in the way. There are times when the path you are on will have to be altered. So, be prepared to have a backup plan.

Remember the Serenity Prayer: “God grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can, and wisdom to know the difference.” It goes without saying, that you will waste a lot of time and energy, if you don’t know the difference.

The next point to cover is when to multi-task. What is this? You say, “This doesn’t sound very Yogic.” Yoga refers to “unity” or “union,” and we must exist in harmony with life as it is today. The mind naturally multi-tasks so, let’s make the most of our time.

In ancient times people multi-tasked, too. Why else would people around the world practice meditation for thousands of years? Why else would the people of India practice Yoga for over 5,000 years? Stress was one of many things our ancestors, and the ancient Yogis, have in common with us, and we know that stress is a killer. Most likely stress is linked to every ailment that connected to mankind.

True irony is when you consider planning time, and start to make excuses why you don’t have time to manage, or plan, your time wisely. If you like to watch television, you could do a little planning at the same time. Ideally, it is best to be totally focused, thinking clearly, and be in a quiet place when planning time.

However, there are other forms of multi-tasking you can do such as listening to an audio book in the car, using an exercise bike while watching television, and reading or listening to books while traveling. There are a number of Yoga, and Yoga philosophy audio books, available.

On the other hand, we know multi-tasking can go too far. I will never forget commuting into Boston, stuck in traffic, and seeing a guy next to me reading a newspaper on his steering wheel! Within the same month, I saw a motorist driving with a hamburger in one hand, and a milk shake in the other, while driving through stop and go traffic on Interstate 95!

We’re not considering reckless multi-tasking, but consider combining tasks that don’t require 100% focus. For example, you cannot focus entirely on an audio book while driving, and you may have to listen to it quite a few times before you mentally digest all the material.

For this very reason, you should not consider listening to, and concentrating on, meditation audio books, while driving your car or operating machinery. Yoga philosophy is one thing, but trying to listen to or practice with a meditation audio book, while driving, is quite another. Therefore, be very careful about the safety factors involved in multi-tasking.

Another point to cover is logistics. When you consider where you are going, always plan to avoid “back tracking.” For example: If you are picking the kids up from school and have to get groceries, make it into a combined trip. If you make it into two trips, this is truly a waste of time. Therefore, plan your trips, whether they are time spent in a car, riding a bike, or walking.

Lastly, make time for family, friends, and loved ones.

Unify your time for a balanced life. Life is not, “all work and no play,” but life is not sitting around living the life of a “couch potato.” Remember one of the best excuses for not attending a Yoga class: “I don’t have the time.”

© Copyright 2005 – Paul Jerard / Aura Publications

More Best Excuse Articles

I recently received an email from a wife that is chock-full of insight that EVERY husband should be aware of.  Especially important about this email is that it BUSTS a destructive myth that many husbands subscribe to…the one that goes like this: “My wife doesn’t really want sex”.

Here’s the letter…and let it really raise your awareness of how your wife is REALLY thinking in relation to you as her husband:

“Hi Calle,

I am a women who recently gave my husband a copy of “How to Create A More Sexual Marriage Relationship” and “How to Turn Your Wife Into a Nymphomaniac”. Of course I read each cover to cover and agreed with about 90% of what each book had to say.

The reason for me purchasing these eBooks is because me and my husband have not had the best sex life lately. In the beginning of our relationship, we had sex ALL THE TIME. It was enjoyable for both of us. Over time, it decreased and decreased and now he is NOT a happy person about it.

I would like to have a better sex life as well.

Of course, my husband is trying to figure why I’m not sexual anymore. He accused me of not being attracted to him which is not the case. He told me that I needed to explore the real reasons I not sexual so that’s how I found your eBooks. I read them, highlighted the things that hit home to me and wrote comments about how I felt about some of the things in the book. I asked him to read them because the eBooks said exactly what I have been trying to say to him all this time.

Needless to say, he absolutely hated the book. He basically said and I quote: “I have some serious issues with these eBooks!  They have some good points but a lot of really bad ones too. There are some things in here that I already do and I get no response from you. It’s really getting to me and making me upset. I think we have some major issues and I don’t think we can solve them. These eBooks make women seem like idiots that don’t know what they want and it seems that you have been tricked into doing what a man wants you to do. I’m sorry but I don’t want to have to trick you for the next 50 years. I’m not saying I can’t improve because I can. I’m just saying this book is wack. I’m going to finish reading it though.”

I responded in a calm way be saying that it was ok for him to feel that way but the eBooks DO describe how women think in relationships. I told him I agreed with what the eBooks had to say and I told him he will not be tricking me because if he did what the eBooks say, I will automatically respond is a sexual way because of his actions.

He then points out that he buys me little gifts and give me massages and compliment me and he gets no response. I have to admit that he does these things, but they are done few and far between and like you said, when he does them I automatically thinks he wants sex. The fact that these things are not continued when he doesn’t get his desired response is because he is doing them because he wants something in return. I expressed that I want to feel like he does it out of love not just because he wants sex. I guess I don’t have to tell you the entire dialogue, but you can feel where this led to, him not talking to me and me feeling like he doesn’t care enough for me to want to understand me.

I started to think that maybe I was a little too direct for him, especially with the highlighting and notes. I just wanted to tell him exactly how I felt. Maybe he thinks that I am blaming him for our sexual problems but that’s not the case. I too know that I have to work on things and to do that I purchased another eBook that is like this but for women to give men what they want (which talks about why sex is important, respect and things of that nature). I just feel like since I’m trying to educate myself about what men really want he should want to do the same.

What do I do when he doesn’t want to respond to your eBooks?” — Mrs. “Y”

Here is my response to Mrs. “Y”…

First of all, by the actions and effort that you are putting into your marriage Mrs. “Y”, I will say that you are most definitely a special, high-quality woman.

Second, I’m going to be blunt…you deserve a better man than your husband currently is…there’s nothing wrong with your sexuality…or your sexual desire…the only thing that’s wrong is you’re not with a man who inspires you to share your sexuality with him. If you were to find yourself with a man who did know how to inspire you…well, you’d find yourself having sex “ALL THE TIME” again.

Now having said these things, let’s explore some of the things you’ve said in your email to me…ending with how to give your husband a chance to get his act together…

1. Just from reading the things you say, I strongly suspect that the biggest issue for you…the biggest reason you are having a hard time being sexually interested in your husband is his BIG interest in himself…and his LITTLE interest in you…except for sexually…AND…his lack of MANHOOD…as evidenced by his blame-shifting and excuse-making.

2. A woman is generally wired in a such a way that she reacts to the man in her life…and this is NOT a bad thing…this does not mean a woman is less than a man in ANY way…it’s a good thing because when a woman has a MAN who is doing the RIGHT things in relation to her…it frees her up to be the amazing, incredible, wonderful, spectacular lady that God created her to be…so that she can in turn create a reaction in her husband that frees him up to be the amazing, incredible, wonderful, spectacular man that God created him to be.  Specifically, a woman can EASILY be affectionate with and sexually attracted to a man who takes the lead and responsibility for creating a positive reaction in her towards him…and a woman is TURNED OFF by a man who does little to nothing to create a positive reaction in her towards him…she’s turned off by a man who expects HER to do the leading and take the responsibility…and of course, these are generally the same men who fault, blame and accuse the woman for her LESSENING desire for him…not realizing…or in many cases…not accepting…that IT’S HIS OWN FAULT FOR NOT STEPPING UP AND BEING A MAN who turns on his lady.

3. If you go back to when you were dating, I believe you’ll find that the man you are married to put effort into creating a positive reaction in you towards him. But, once he “got you”…once he said “I do”…then at that point, he started putting less and less effort into creating a positive reaction in you towards him…he started taking you for granted…he started acting like he was ENTITLED…until now, it probably seems to you that he mostly cares about his interests…and you GIVING him whatever it is that he wants from you…whether he’s inspired or motivated you to give it to him or not. And, over time, it’s getting harder and harder for you to “give” to this kind of man.

4. Yes, he “hated” the eBooks because they pointed out that HE is the one who needs to step up…he wanted everything to be YOUR fault…he wanted YOU to be the problem…not him! And, my eBooks point out that HE is the one who needs to start doing things in a different way so that HE can start creating a more positive response in you towards him. My eBooks pointed out how HE needed to grow and mature and develop and learn and implement but that’s not what he wants to do. Consequently, the “best” excuse and blame-shift that he could come up with is that my materials “make women seem like idiots” who have to be “tricked” when in fact (just as you stated), my eBooks are spot on when it comes to what women want and need from a man in a relationship so that she can be attracted to him and sexually turned on by him.

5. If your husband were a REAL MAN, he would have responded with something like, “Wow! I am amazed…and impressed…and super-pleased…I’m REALLY glad that you want to be a “nymphomaniac wife” for me…that you have taken the initiative…and spent the money to help US improve our marriage and our relationship…and I’ll be honest…these ideas are so different from how I’m used to thinking about things…this is totally different and unexpected…but I HEAR YOU telling me that this is how you think as a woman…that this describes what your needs are…and how you want your man to operate…that THIS IS WHAT YOU WANT AS A WOMAN…SO THANK YOU…and I’m going to earnestly study these materials…and I ask you to help me…and be patient with me…I’m sure it will take me a while to make the shifts and changes…it will take me a lot of practice…and probably I’ll slip back on occasion to my “old ways”…and I’ll be MAN enough to receive your input/feedback that tells me I’ve “slipped”…[name], I love you! I want you to know that I think you are an incredibly special woman…and I’m glad I’m married to you…I’m glad that you are my wife!”

6. If your husband had of responded with something like this, I’m quite certain that you would have JUMPED him right then and there…and probably the two of you would have had some of the most exciting, passionate lovemaking that you’ve had in years…if not ever. Sadly, your husband did not MAN UP…and consequently, HE missed out on a HUGE opportunity to GET the very thing he’s saying he wants…and he left you feeling even more turned off towards him and less hopeful about your relationship with him than what you were before.

7. Moreover, not only did your husband not receive your message in a MANLY way…he then went into a NON-MANLY defensive frame where he starts telling you about the FEW things he IS doing…and he has completely missed..or ignored…my message that it’s not WHAT you do nearly as much as it’s the spirit, attitude, and intention that’s behind what you do. So, that’s why your husband can do things that you want and need…but if the right spirit, attitude, and intention is missing…then it will NOT work for you…as evidenced by the reaction that you are having towards him when he does do them.

8. And, as you pointed out…it IS a huge turn-off to a woman when a man is operating in a manipulative way…where he mostly ignores or belittles you…but suddenly he does certain “nice” things in order to get what he wants (sex). Yes, it’s pretty much disgusting to a woman.

9. Yes, your husband’s immaturity, neediness, insecurity, and lack of masculinity…all the things that are turning you off and killing your desire for sex with him…was further evidenced by his “pouting” and “silent treatment” that he gave you. That’s NOT how a MAN acts.

10. No, you were NOT too direct with him. You did exactly what you should have done. And, as you go forward, here is EXACTLY what I suggest you tell him every time he raises the subject of relationship or sex: “Husband-name, I WANT a man who I can trust and respect enough to be affectionate and sexual with him…I want a man who does the things that turn me on…and I’ve given you the eBooks that explain EXACTLY what I want and need from you in order to feel these things…I have completely opened myself up to you with complete honesty and openness…and you can either honor me by studying, embracing, and applying these eBooks and the highlights I’ve made and the notes I’ve written…which will bring us back to what we had in the beginning and take us beyond that…or you can dishonor me by ignoring these eBooks…or pooh-poohing them…and our marriage relationship will continue to deteriorate until I cannot take it anymore and must move on to another man who WILL do the things that turn me on.”

Bottom line, you can only give your husband the input and the opportunity to make the shifts and improvements that will create the turned-on reaction in you towards him.  Beyond that, it’s up to him to listen to you or ignore you…and it’s up to you to decide what kind of man you choose to live with.

Copyright 2010, Article by Calle Zorro of DoThisGetSex.com a site for men

Find More Best Excuse Articles

A vid from Break.com, its an edited segement from CBS Eyewitness, but I’m gonna use this excuse
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this man has the best excuse to get of work and go to vegas
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Join us at forum.chatdd.com
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Which helpful item do you reach for when your toddler upends a whole bowl of spaghetti right onto your clean kitchen floor? This is not a mess that your vacuum cleaner or carpet sweeper can handle, but it is no worse than a handful of pencil shavings to your Shark VX3 Cordless Sweeper. The Shark VX3 Cordless Sweeper is a rechargeable cordless floor cleaner that is designed to handle the projects that your regular vacuum cleaner would spit dust bunnies over. If you are looking for the perfect floor cleaning tool to help keep your home sparkling clean, look no further. The Shark VX3 is designed with today’s homes in mind.

Lightweight and Easy to Use

Many individuals are tired of trying to maneuver an oversized vacuum cleaner around the house. Do your stairs never get vacuumed because the vacuum itself is too heavy to carry up the stairs? Have you considered buying a second sweeper just for the second floor? The Shark VX3 is a featherweight 4 pounds, which is light enough to lift in one hand and certainly no problem to carry up and down the stairs. How much easier does that make your life?

You’re not tied to the electrical outlet.

The Shark VX3 is cordless, so the days of plugging and unplugging the machine and trying to maneuver around the electrical cord are over. The battery holds a generous 90 minutes worth of charge, which is more time than you need to clean up even the most serious mess. By using the Shark VX3 you do not have to move furniture to get to electrical outlets, or pull out the extension cord for those hard to reach places that no outlet is quite close enough for plugging in. Plug in the charger, and never have to worry about finding a place for power again.

The Shark VX3 is powered by a rechargeable battery that has a useable life of about a year before it needs replacing.

Swivel handle makes it easy to maneuver.

The light weight is only one factor which makes the Shark VX3 easy to maneuver. The Shark features a patented swivel steering suspension that lets you push the vacuum in any direction, wheel it around corners and furniture edges and get in close to walls to sweep up all the dust and dirt. Try that with an oversized vacuum cleaner!

Get rid of your kids’ best excuse to get out of vacuuming.

Many kids have discovered a never-fail excuse to get out of doing the vacuuming. “Hey, mom, we’re out of vacuum cleaner bags!” That will never happen with the Shark VX3. Instead of vacuum cleaner bags, everything you sweep up ends up in an easy to empty dust cup in the bottom of the sweeper. The dust cup has an added bonus as well: you don’t have all that dust and dirt and germs sitting in a dark vacuum cleaner bag to spread every time you turn on the machine.

Even better, you never have to touch the dirt. The dust cup ejects at the push of a button, and you can carry it to the nearest dust bin still attached to the long handle.

Hardwoods to Shag Carpeting, the Shark VX3 does it all

The VX3 has two speed settings to handle any type of surface from hardwoods to shag carpeting. You can easy flip between the two, unlike other sweepers that complicate things by making you switch heads or flip the cleaner over, or pop in a beater bar. Vinyl floors, tile floors, carpet and rugs, the Shark can handle cleaning any or all of the above.

Save your back with the patented Backsaver bending handle

One of the best features of the Shark VX3 is the patented long handle that bends in the middle to get under furniture. With the Shark, there’s no need to stoop and bend in order to get the cleaner under the coffee table or the couch. The handle does the bending for you, so that you do not have to strain your back.

The Shark VX3 is omnivorous.

Remember that spaghetti? You would never try to suck that up with your traditional vacuum cleaner, but the Shark is designed to handle the messes that your regular vacuum cleaner can’t tackle. Sawdust, nuts and bolts and messy food spills are all well within its power.

The Shark VX3 is not meant to be a replacement for a standard vacuum cleaner. Rather, it’s a great house-cleaning tool that takes care of the things that your vacuum cleaner doesn’t. Use it for spot cleaning, tight spots and cleaning multiple surfaces. The Shark VX3 is clearly the best choice for one of those jobs.

Related Best Excuse Articles